[524-2510]

(continuation of the short story: [2-803.10])

She jumped out of her bed startled by her phone ringing. She went to check it. It was someone apologizing- the wrong number. She placed her phone back on her side table and attempted to fall back asleep. She closed her eyes and steadied her breath. She moved around under the covers. She squirmed around a little and got more comfortable to try and fall asleep. Inhale and exhale. Inhale. Exhale. Then she finally drifted back to sleep.

Then out of nowhere a loud clang and the swinging of the blinds from the window interrupted her sleep. She tried to ignore the alternating sunlight and shade against her eyelids caused from the ruckus of her pet cat attempting to catch a bird outside.

She gave in, the world obviously did not wanting her to sleep-in today, and sat up from her white cloud-like bed. She called her bed cloud because she has trouble sleeping. Her life and body don’t let her get a lot of it, but when she does her bed is soft, comfy, white and cloud-like. She says it’s her haven.

She stretched, yawned and grunted until she argued with herself to get out of the clouds and face reality. It was way too early and she wasn’t ready for the world, but nonetheless she struggled to the shower. 

*   *   *

The bathroom door opened and the trapped steam from the shower dispersed into the bedroom. The cold rush of air along her dampened body relaxed her.

She thought to herself, “what did I just do last night?” She couldn’t shake the feeling. It was a secret she had to keep, that bugged and plagued her inner core.

As she changed, she kept replaying what happened in her head. Her face read “Oh my gosh,” disappointment, confusion and regret.

“What happens next? What am I going to do now?” she asked herself under her breath as she brushed her dripping hair.

Her mind just went back to that night. The image of them kissing made her sick to her stomach and the events that continued made her put down the brush, lean over the sink, and place her face in her hands, shaking, and on the verge of tears. 

Dry heaving and her body jerking. Tears welling up as she grabs the edges of the sink and one swift jerk towards the open toilet and she vomits.

*   *   *

She brushes her teeth and washes her face with cold water. A knock happens at the door.

“Are you ok in there?” asks her roommate.

She opens the door and walks by quickly, not making much contact with her. She remained silent. She doesn’t say anything.

*   *   *

She didn’t say much all day. She was quiet, with only her thoughts to keep her company. Although, she was with her roommate all day, she wasn’t present. She didn’t say much. She didn’t want to be there. She knew she would say something.

Keeping this secret was hard. Keeping it from them, her roommate, was even harder. She knew they could handle it, but the bigger problem was hearing herself saying it out loud would solidify what she thought was a mistake.